When Your Friend Has a Child with Special Needs

The Imperfect Homeschooler

When Your Friend Has a Child with Special Needs — part 1

I’ve been a member of one homeschool support group or another for the better part of 20 years now, and I think one of the best things about support groups is the way one can pull together to support a member who has just had a baby.

Let’s face it, we are all very busy, so it’s easy to understand just how much it means to the mom with the new baby (whether it’s her second or her eighth) to be the recipient of hot meals for a week or two. This form of support is invaluable, isn’t it?

Often, one of the expectant mom’s friends will begin rallying her homeschooling friends even before the baby arrives. Everyone commits ahead of time to helping the new mom, and they wait expectantly for the news (in our group, it usually arrives by email) that a baby has arrived, and that there’s a family that needs congratulations and a hot meal. It becomes quite an exciting time.

But once in a while, the news of a baby’s birth comes with something unexpected: the revelation that the baby has special needs. Whether the source of the disability is from premature birth, a birth defect or a birth accident, the lives of an entire group of women are affected by the news. It’s hard to know what to do, beyond sending a meal. But this woman and her family will need the support of friends for quite some time, maybe for years, and a meal is just the start. But that leaves the question, what else can homeschooling parents do to give support to a fellow homeschooling family with a special needs child?

Cardamom Publishers

P.O. Box 4

Sturgeon Bay, WI 54235

Having a child with special needs myself, I’ve got a few ideas for you. I was between support groups at the time my son with Down syndrome was born, but I’ve been in several groups since then. I also know quite a few homeschooling moms who have children with disabilities, and we’ve shared our experiences with each other. It’s from those discussions that I’ve come up with some ways you can support a homeschooling family in this challenging situation.

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